Reflections on 15 Years

This week, my husband and I marked 15 years of marriage, which I consider an accomplishment in today's society but is a drop in the bucket compared to the 50 years both of our parents have shared.

The years we have shared have not been easy, some have flown by and some seemed to never end. Some years we were fortunate, and others it seemed we could not catch a break! We have faced nearly all the major stressors of a marriage and so far have come out together. It has not been easy.

Why has it worked so far? Our upbringing, our nature, our faith.

My husband and I are complete opposites in many ways.

I am a planner. He cannot plan beyond the current week. I love to make holidays special and feel loved by gifts. He doesn't like any attention on himself, has very few needs for "stuff" and thinks its silly to celebrate birthdays and such. I'm the nurturer. He is the disciplinarian. I love to read. His idea of reading is The Daily Racing Forum.  

Sometimes these differences make life interesting, sometimes exasperating and sometimes they provide just the right balance. 

One quality we both have in common is tenacity. We are both hard working and committed. When things go wrong, we don't let them get us down. We "suck it up" and make a new plan. Maybe it's the Irish in us or the Midwestern heritage in me and the New Englander in him but it works. 

We also have an innate attitude that you do what you need to do to get the job done. We understand sacrifice, as modeled by our parents. 

Life has dealt us its share of struggles, but we always seem to land in our feet (by the grace of God).

We share a same faith and belief that our vows mean something. We take the whole "for better, for worse, in sickness and health, for richer and poorer, in good times and bad, until death do us part" seriously. We know it won't all be as exhilarating as our dating period was. We know marriage takes work and we are learning what that means every day. Sometimes we are doing well, and sometimes we struggle. Through all this we hold onto our love, our faith, the belief that we are each other's "person" and we are in this life together, wherever it may lead.

He Did It

This month we celebrate Down syndrome Awareness month and Developmental Disabilities Month. We honor the month by walking in Buddy Walk Atlanta put on by the Down Syndrome Association of Atlanta. (You can still support our team!) 

The day is like a giant family reunion of the close community of people who know what it is like to love, care for, be challenged and inspired by a person who has Down syndrome, also known as Trisomy 21. We walk in support of our son, Joey.

Each year, I learn more about life from my son. It was the day before Buddy Walk this year when I had an occasion to observe the sweet tenacity that I know will help my son achieve great things in this world. 

Tenacity, or sticktoativeness, is a character trait I admire a lot and I believe it can have a huge impact on how your life turns out if you don't have it.

It was late in the day, and the crowds had thinned at at our church fall festival. We wanted to have the kids expend some energy, so we went to the bouncy houses. They all love them.

They immediately gravitated to one that had an obstacle course, climbing wall and slide. My son made it through the obstacles, but I was worried he would not be able to climb the ladder.

You see, people with Down syndrome have lower muscle tone. This means they often have to work harder on physical tasks and it may take longer to learn physical skills. 

So when it came to the climbing wall, Joe had a challenge. He faced it head on trying several times to get past that first step, each time with determination and hope. After getting a little help by his sisters, Joe was eager to try again, on his own. 

He climbed without worrying about who was behind him, who was passing him (accomplishing the task better than he) or who was watching. When he slipped, he started climbing all over again with a big smile to boot! It did not take him long to literally learn the ropes and soon he was climbing all on his own. As he neared the top, he turned and said "I did it!" Yes, buddy you sure did!!! 

What do working moms and frogs have in common?

How do you boil a frog? If you put him in boiling water, he will jump out. But if you put him in a pot of water and then slowly turn up the gas, he will doze off until death. Well, being a working mom, is kind of like being that unknowing frog.

I have been a work out-of-the-home mom for almost 13 years. Except for work from home Fridays, and a brief period in which I worked in a virtual office, I have worked in a traditional office in the fast-paced field of public relations. I have been fairly successful, working at a nice firm that has great perks, got to travel to amazing places and serve clients who are making a difference in the world. At the same time, my precious family has grown and I have been involved at school, with Girl Scouts, advocating for my son and volunteering. It easy to think I have been doing all right. It's easy to be fooled. 

You see, as I had more babies, it got more difficult. Traffic has always been an issue, there have been times I traveled two hours each way to and from work, for many years it was at least one hour each way. When I moved to our current neighborhood, my commute was cut to 20-30 minutes each way. With this new found convenience, it was easy to fool myself into thinking I had it all together. That this "extra" time was put toward my family, but I still didn't make it home much before seven. My husband and I played tag team with house and kid responsibilities to juggle responsibilities at our two jobs.

I was missing my family, my life. We were just barely getting by and I didn't see it.

As a working mom I jumped into that pot of water. Each year, as I had more children, took on more responsibility at work, got involved at the school and in extracurriculars, the pot of water got warmer and warmer. I was unknowingly existing in a constant state of stress - boiling. Yet, somehow I was so used to it, it seemed normal. 

Sometimes, it takes being plucked out of the pot to fully realize all the stress that was bubbling up underneath you all along.

That is what happened to me. I was simmering in the pot and was given an opportunity to jump out. I'm beginning a new career as a work from home mom, an entrepreneur. I'm starting my own communications firm and I signed my first client today! 

Now I know working from home and launching my own business will bring its own stress, especially since I'm launching just as summer takes off. However, I've already had a glimpse at how being present and available can positively affect my whole family. It's an incredibly exciting road ahead that is God's design, not my plan. It came together unexpectedly and clearly with God's fingerprint all over it and I'm excited to be on this journey.

Being a mom, whether you stay at home, work from home or work out of the home, will always be a balancing act. Dear moms, don't let the stress lull you into such a numbness that you get boiled like the frog, listen to that still small voice that tells you there is another path, wake up and jump out so you can be all you were designed to be.  

Embracing Change

One thing that I know for sure: change is constant. It seems that whenever I get a handle on where I am, something happens to move me some place else. Perhaps God is trying to teach me something. Either I am a quick learner, so he keeps teaching me more and more, or I am thick headed and I can't quite get the lesson. It's most likely the latter.

When I was younger, I had to have everything planned out ahead of time. I did not react well when things did not go according to plan. I thought I could control everything. As I grew older, I came to realize there is actually very little that I do control. It has taken a lot of "character building" for me to loosen my grip on control and learn how to react to the unexpected in life.

Sometimes the reason for the change is a heartbreak or disappointment; sometimes it is caused by a transition in life; other times it seemingly happens for no reason at all. But I truly believe there is a master plan. God is involved in all of it and I have learned to lean on Him and trust that he has plans to prosper and not harm me, to give me a hope and a future.

So, I lean in to the change.

Now, when something happens that is outside of my plan, I take a deep breath and step back. I look at the situation and ask myself a few questions:

• What are the immediate effects of this change?
• What are the challenges and what are the opportunities?
• Why did this happen now? 
• What role did I have in it? 
• What could I have done differently?
• What is God trying to teach me or tell me through this?
• How should I respond?
• What are our next steps?

Then, I pray and lift all of these questions and answers up to God. I pray and then I wait. I trust that whatever is ahead of me is better than what is behind me and that there is a purpose in every challenge.

How do you embrace the change in your life?

How to Uncomplicate Your Life

Life is extremely complicated. Living out this life as a full-time working mom, wife, mother of three, daughter, volunteer, servant gets messy and I don't always do it well. It can so easily become unbalanced. Schedules get full, obligations (both real and made up in my mind) take over and I become overcome with anxiety. I lash out, I stress out, I gain weight, I stumble. I want to fill all my roles well. I am doing important things. Yet, I often find myself completely exhausted and I just need a pillow and some rest. However, it seems I just don't know how to do that. To stop. To rest. To just be.

Yet the solution is simple and it is uncomplicated.

Stovall Weems, pastor of Celebration Church in Jacksonville, Florida provides an approachable, easy to digest guide for applying the biblical principle of putting God first. 

I'm sure you are familiar with the verse Mathew 6:33 that tells us to seek first the kingdom of God. But how does that apply to your daily life? How does one seek God first?

In The God First Life - Uncomplicate Your Life God's Way, Weems explains how to change

our priorities to live out the life we were designed for.

The new priority of our lives is to truly put God first above our own desires, hopes, challenges and circumstances. It is a commitment to living your life God's way. Weems says, "The primary thing we should wish for, crave, diligently seek is God. And when this proper order is restored, the blessing is released into our lives." (28)

The God First Life outlines how to practically reorder your priorities every day to put God first and foremost. He aligns each principle with scripture and includes examples from the early church and believers of this age. Weems says God First living comes out of seven key decisions:

• I will make God's family (the Church) my primary family
• I will engage in the community life of the church
• I will be filled by the Spirit
• I will worship God on my own and with my church family
• I will spend time with God through prayer and His Word
• I will give of myself and my means
• I will experience freedom, joy and blessing that God offers

Weems goes on to unpack each of those decisions through vivid examples and practical application. He reminded me of how it felt to be a new believer totally in love with my savior. And he encouraged me to be engaged in a long-term commitment to total personal transformation (sanctification) for Christ. He point's out that God gave us the sculpting tools to enact this transformation - His Church, His Word, His Spirit, His presence, His son. 

Reading this book opened my eyes to the bland faith I have been living. Working each day for God's Kingdom at a Christian PR firm, it is easy to believe that I'm living for God but the reality is that He has not been a priority.  The busyness of my life, the life stage of my young ones, has put Him on the back burner. Though it will take some rearranging and dedication, I must reorder my life so that I am tapped into the One who can truly give me rest, and who has a plan for me. Plans to prosper me and not harm me. Plans to give me a hope and a future. 

His plan is better than my plan. 

Only one thing can hold me back - fear. Giving our trust to the Lord is a leap of faith. Living life is like being blindfolded and behind the wheel of a mini-van full of children. To make it through, we must trust that God has the map for our journey and completely rely on Him. step-by-step, to provide clear directions to our destination. If we try to steer on our own, we will surely crash. 

But perfect love casts out fear or put another way, "only an act of true love can thaw a frozen heart." Jesus's act of true love on the cross can cast out our fear and lack of trust. So, I choose to put on the spirit of power, love and sound mind, as well as that blindfold, and commit to anchor myself in Him who directs my path.

About The God First Life - Uncomplicate Your Life, God's Way
A simple and sustainable path to a deep and satisfying walk with Christ There are thousands of how-to books for improving various areas of life---self, relationships, finances, fitness, business, marriage, family. And there are nearly as many books written for believers offering a framework for the 'right' approach to a new life in God. What if it were possible, Pastor Stovall Weems asks,to boil it all down to one practical, un-complicated principle that would yield the vibrant, purposeful spiritual life so many are looking for? What if, in our relationship with God, we had one simple and sustainable touch point to experience a deep and satisfying walk with Christ? In The God-First Life, Weems shows that true success in our walk with God and in life in general is not an issue of need, but an issue of order. Brilliantly unpacking the simple Scripture in Matthew 6:33, Weems gives a fresh and practical perspective on what Christian 'discipleship' is about. Bringing clarity, depth, and simplicity, Pastor Weems makes clear core truths that have been misunderstood by many Christians and non-Christians alike.

About the Author
Stovall Weems is the founder and lead pastor of Celebration Church in Jacksonville, FL. Celebration is a global, diverse, growing multisite church, with more than twelve thousand people in weekly attendance. As a pastor, teacher, writer and sought-after conference speaker, his ministry focuses on building the local church, reaching people with the gospel, and developing passionate followers of Christ. Stovall and his wife, Kerri, have three children, Kaylan, Stovie, and Annabelle.

Disclosure of material connection: I received one or more of the products mentioned above for free in the hope that I would give it my fair review. I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."

Easter Angst: The Bunny v The Cross

Another religious holiday taken over by consumerism faces us this month. As a believer, a Catholic and a parent, I am torn between the significance of the day and my children's delight in the expectation of the bunny. Do I forgo the bunny all together or try to balance the bunny fun with the gift of Easter?

Growing up I remember shopping for our Easter finest, dressing up, attending Mass and having a big family dinner. But I also remember dying eggs with my brothers, getting up on Easter morning and searching the house for the eggs that made a trail to our hidden baskets, and devouring lots of Easter chocolate. When I was young, I'm not sure I understood the significance of Christ dying on the cross for my sins, but somewhere along the way the Easter bunny took a back seat to Christ. Maybe it will be that way for my kids. But can they enjoy the bunny and still honor Christ?

I don't really want to keep them from the egg hunts, egg dying and Easter morning excitement. I just want them to understand that we celebrate because Christ has risen and we are free! So do I blend baskets, bunnies and eggs with the cross and empty tomb? 

Focus on the Family tell us that: Bunnies, eggs, baskets and more can become tools that parents use to bring a greater understanding of the message of Easter. Some ideas they offer here include telling the story of Easter with eggs, use characteristics of the Easter bunny to show how they are similar to characteristics of Jesus and define the terms told in the biblical Easter story so they can understand the story that is being told.

Other ideas for putting the focus on faith over fur this Easter, include:

• Make a resurrection garden
• Put faith-related items in the Easter basket such as a new devotional, cross jewelry, a Christian fiction novel, a puppet skit book that tells stories from the people who met Jesus, faith-based toys from Wee Believers and chocolate in the shape of a cross
• Count down the 12 days til Easter by telling the Easter story through Resurrection Eggs
• Celebrate the Passover meal and discuss the relationship between the last supper and Passover 

A book I recommend is The Sparkle Egg by Jill Hardie and beautifully illustrated by Christine Kornacki. The story is about a boy named Sam who is very excited about Easter coming. His excitement is dampened by the guilt he feels over a lie he tells his mom. Even though Sam's mom and dad forgave him, and he prayed for God's forgiveness, Sam still feels shame for the fib he told. Sam's mom helps him make a special craft called a Sparkle Egg and tells him to write down anything he feels bad about, or ashamed of, on a piece paper and put it inside the egg.

On Easter morning, Sam is excited about his Easter basket and even more excited about his Sparkle Egg. When he opens the egg, it is empty- just like the tomb. His parents explain that because Jesus died and rose again, we are forgiven. Once Sam accepts that he is truly forgiven and receives God's grace, he can shine and shimmer just like the Sparkle Egg. This relatable tale provides a tangible reminder of God's goodness and forgiveness.

I would love to hear how you observe Lent and Easter. Do you include the bunny? If you are a Christian, how do you keep Christ the center? 

Disclosure of material connection: I received one or more of the products mentioned above for free in the hope that I would give it my fair review. I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."

The Measure of Success: How Do You Measure Up?

It is Transformation Tuesday! Today, coinciding with the Measure of Success Blog Tour, I am writing about how my view of success has transformed throughout the past 20 years. 

As part of the Blog Tour, I am excited to be writing alongside hundreds of other inspiring authors about what success looks like. Learn more and join in the blog tour – CLICK HERE! Read on to learn more about my own transformation.

Do you think it’s possible for women to “have it all”? In other words, can someone have a thriving career and a thriving home life? What do you think makes this possible or impossible? 

I think it is possible for women to have both a thriving career and home life but not with out a lot of hard work, trial-and-error and support from her employer, colleagues and family. The trick is to find out how to keep things relatively in balance. Ever since I became a mother in 2001, I have been a full time, work outside the home mom. Now, with three kids from tween to preschool, I have different challenges than when I only had my first child. When I had one child, it was easier for me to do what was necessary to get ahead - work longer hours, travel, etc. There were fewer schedules to juggle. We also had less expenses so I felt a little more at ease taking career risks.

Now, with three kids, I feel more pressure when I am traveling, staying late, taking after hour calls or answering emails at night. I know how much pressure that puts on my husband's shoulders. His understanding and support is the main thing that has made it possible for me to be successful in my career. He wants me to do my best. He doesn't shrink from childcare duties, from parenting.

Have you ever had to make a difficult decision about work? This could be something such as quitting a job, taking on a second job, changing careers, starting over in the workplace after staying home, etc.? What motivated you to make that decision?

There have been a few times when I had to make difficult work decisions. One big one was when I was recruited to go run a PR firm for Catholic organizations. I had just completed six years of service at my firm, I loved my colleagues and I had the flexibility of working from home one day a week. But I wanted to grow and experience new challenges that launching a firm and managing an agency would bring. Challenges I could not experience where I was. So, I took the plunge and left a relatively secure workplace to launch a start up without any previous management experience. I would never do that now! 

Another time, during the recession and when I was out of work, I had to make the decision to be up front about the work/life balance needs I was desiring in a new position. Atlanta is a huge traffic nightmare and If I was going to commute into the city, I was not going to give up the ability to work from home at least one day week or lose vacation time I had accrued elsewhere. This kept me from some good opportunities, but I have my sanity intact - at least most of the time.

What do you think has shaped your sense of success? What do you think has driven your choices about work?

My sense of success has changed over time and as I have matured as a person and as a Christian. I used to think the big salary, title and corner office meant success. When I got the big title I sort of let it go to my head. That experience taught me a lot and out of it came my biggest period of professional and spiritual growth. Now I feel that success for me means so much less about material things and so much more about connection. To me success means:

• Having a deep, personal relationship with Jesus and making room to grow in faith
• Making a decent living, doing something meaningful that I enjoy (which in my case is helping Christian organizations, businesses and nonprofits communicate) and doing it well
• Having the respect and friendship of my clients, my colleagues and my senior management team
• Enjoying a level of balance that allows me to give my best to my job and my family
• Living within our means 
• Having a comfortable, inviting home
• Being involved with each of my kids in a meaningful, personal way and connecting with them daily
• A strong devotion and connection with my husband that deepens every year despite any struggles we face
• Making a difference in my community

Certainly, finances have influenced my choices about work but I have always known I would work. My mom worked and yet she had the flexibility to always be there when I was home from school. I did well in school and pursued a journalism degree in college and never really thought I would not work. I am doer. If I was a SAHM, I can't even imagine the number of things I would be involved in outside the home. It is just in my nature.

Can a woman be godly and pursue a successful career?

Absolutely, women have always worked. They just might not have gotten paid for it. Being Godly is a condition of the heart. If you are following God's will for your life, loving and serving others it should not matter whether you work inside the home or outside the home. Both of those jobs have their own set of challenges. God has given each of us gifts and for some of us that means using them in a traditional work environment. 


What about you? Please comment below with your answers to the prompt questions and share on social media using the hashtag #measuringup or post a picture of “where you work” using the hashtag #measuringup. 

Carolyn McCulley wrote the Measure of Success about women, work and the home. Get your copy here.

World Down Syndrome Day: Our Hopes for Joey

It's World Down Syndrome Day! A day to celebrate the amazing persons who happen to have an extra copy of the 21st chromosome. This is my three year old. This sweet little guy had stole my heart. I'm so proud to be his mom and am so hopeful for his bright future.

While this developmental disability means that in some things Joey progresses a little slower than his peers, raising Joey hasn't been too much different than raising his sisters. Sure we take him to tutoring to make sure he's ready for Kindergarten. We have speech therapy, physical therapy and IEPs. But really, each of our children has their own issues, things we are working on and skills we are trying to develop. And they each present their own set of parenting challenges. 

For Joey, that means providing him the therapies and education opportunities from pre-K through college so that he can develop the skills and compentencies to eventually earn an appropriate wage doing something he enjoys, participate in hobbies and activities, live independently and have meaningful relationships. See, not really that different! 

Here's a glimpse at Joey's life now.

He is the first to wake up most mornings. 

He is learning to butter his own toast. He's so proud of himself!

He loves it when his Pop drives him to school.

He is learning his letters, to spell his name, colors, shapes and school readiness skills in his three year old Pre-k class. Our goal is that he will be ready to join Kindergarten with his typical peers.

He loves to help out, even sweeping up at the hair salon. He also helps switch over the laundry and empty the dishwasher.

He loves playing with friends at GiGis playhouse on Saturdays. 

He loves his big sisters and enjoys playing with them, chasing them, dancing with them, and currently, watching Frozen with them over and over.

Consider joining me in support of World Down Syndrome Day by donating $3.21 on 3/21 to the Down Syndrome Association of Atlanta!

Shazzy Fitness Giveaway

This has been quite a week. Sunday my littlest awoke from his nap very cranky and then didn't want to eat much. He did eat a little hot dog, some milk and Cheetos..which came back up later that evening! The poor little guy was up most of the night. It was really his first time being sick like that and he was a trooper.

Tuesday morning, my oldest said she was not feeling very well. She was all dressed, and so excited, for a big chorus performance her school was participating in. Before we could leave the house, she got sick. Then, I went to the doctor for pre-op for a surgery I am having on Thursday and by the time I got home, my stomach was churning. Next, my husband came home from work not feeling well and finally, my other daughter threw up on her way home from school. So there we all were last night with buckets and trash cans nearby - all sick together. Except for my little guy who was looking for trouble.

Well, it was a rough night,  but now we are on the mend and I am mentally preparing for surgery. Its to fix a side effect of PCOS and the crazy hormonal issues I have to deal with. Prayers would be appreciated!


Well, before all of this sickness, I was participating in a seven day fitness challenge with Shazzy ShazzyFitness.com. I did a review of the Shazzy Fitness workouts last November. This week, I get to give away two heart thumping, soul lifting dance fitness DVDs here on the blog! Enter below. The giveaway ends on Sunday.
Fitness. My friend Kristy started Shazzy Fitness inspired to provide a work out that is uplifting, challenging and appropriate. She's been working hard to share Shazzy with the world. Be sure to check it out at

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Ten Ways To Help Your Kids Fall in Love With Jesus

I have been disturbed lately about what my children are consuming in school, in the media, from their friends, and if we are doing enough to instill character and values with our kids.

We are undermined at every turn. Every TV show now portrays what used to be alternative lifestyles as normal, even to be celebrated. Yet, traditional Judeo-Christian values are being vilified and presented as "different" and no longer mainstream. At the same time, we are often so wrapped up in the fast pace of life we may take for granted that our values are being taught. And truthfully, perhaps this stress-filled, connected 24/7 life we lead may mean that some values aren't being "caught" either.

Well, the Holy Spirit had been gently urging me to be more intentional in teaching my children the ways of The Lord both in what I teach by my own actions and in what I teach intentionally. So, with it being Valentines Day, I thought I would share 10 Ways to help your children fall in love with Jesus.

1. Start small but be intentional

If your faith has been more of a personal thing or if you have left faith formation to the Sunday school teacher, it would be strange to go from little discussion about faith to daily Bible study. Work it in gradually, intentionally and authentically.

2. Tell stories and play games.

People remember stories. People relate to stories. The Bible is rich with stories. Read them to your kids before bed. Include at least one Bible story among your good night books. Make learning fun. Download interactive story books and apps. Make crafts to go along with the stories.

Resource: The Beginner's Bible  by ZonderKidz

3. Learn His word

Have a family memory verse each week. Recite it before dinner. Talk about what it means. Proverbs are a good place to start. 

Hang scripture up in your home (Check out DaySpring home collection). Study scripture through age appropriate Bible studies.

Resource: The Story for Little Ones, The Story for Children and The Story for Teens - age appropriate chronological presentation of scripture (NIV) published by Zondervan

I'm currently looking for a pre-teen/teen girl Bible study to do with my oldest. Any suggestions?

4. Daily prayer touch points

Pray before meals, pray at bedtime, work in time for prayer. Model talking to God formally and informally. And most importantly, pray for your children. 

Growing up in a traditional Catholic home, family prayer was mostly done at holiday meals. I knew my parents prayed and we did our night time prayers by the bed. But just having a conversation with God was rare (except for my grandma - who often called out to Jesus, Mary and Joseph). My husband's experience was similar. I was very active in both my southern Catholic (there is a difference between southern grown and northern born Catholics) and Southern Baptist youth groups (I know, right?) so I eventually became comfortable with casual conversations with God internally and out loud. I cherish both the traditional prayers as well as spontaneous spirit-led prayers and I need to make sure to model both types of communication with God for my children.

Resource: Praying the Scriptures for Your Children by Jodi Berndt 

5. Don't ignore culture disparity 

When you see behaviors and beliefs that differ from your family values, talk about it, pray about it and turn to scripture. This is something I am very aware of with my pre-teen right now. Culture shows her a world that does not align with our values. We have to talk about how her childhood hero Hannah Montana has faced challenges and made some bad choices as the grown up Miley Cyrus. We use these things as teachable moments.

6. Worship regularly

Go to church regularly and take your kids. Model what it is to be engaged and ready at Church. Sing worship songs at home and in your travels. Praise God for what you are thankful for throughout the day.

I confess the business of life has kept us from regularly attending Mass. By Sunday we are exhausted and attending Mass with my three kids is a little bit like attending a three ring circus but I must do better!

7. Serve each other

Serve your family and others. Engage your family in service projects. Find joy in helping others. Model that faith is extending yourself in service to others. Service projects we enjoy are giving gently used items to families that need them, participating in Operation Christmas Child, joining in community clean up days. One project we are looking forward to participating in this year is Sole Hope - which takes your old jeans and turns them into shoes for people in under developed countries.

8. Build community

Be active in your church and find fellowship with other Christians. Join youth group and church sports leagues and clubs to encourage a foundation of Christian friends. I am still connected to my friends in both my Catholic and baptist youth groups of my teen years. Those years and friendships build a solid foundation that even in my wandering years, kept me tethered to God.

9. Share our rich history and traditions

Become knowledgeable about your Bible and Church history. Learn about the saints who have gone before us. Observe holy days and sacred tradition with reverence and anticipation. See our family traditions for Lent and Advent. We have an epidemic of Bible illiteracy in America. We need to not only teach what the Word says, but also about the rich history of the church and the amazing story of the Bible's translation, dissemination and preservation for thousands of years. 

Resource: Guiding Your Catholic Preschooler by Kathy Pierce and Lori Rowland

10. Equip yourself and your family with a Christian world view

We need to teach our children to defend the faith in a secular society. We need to learn how to think critically about the messages bombarding us every day and discern how they relate to God's word. We need to know how to respond with love but in Truth.

Read How Now Shall We Live by Charles Colson and follow the Chuck Colson Center for Christian Worldview online. 


Great resources for teaching a Christian world view to your family are:

Our 24 Family Ways by Clay Clarkson 
Footings for Children by Dwight Vogt and Karen Jacobsen

Please share your tips in the comments below and Have a Happy Valentines Day! 

The Key to Stress Relief Lies Within You

It's the end of January. Resolutions may be languishing in the dust. The holiday bills are sitting on the counter. Its cold outside. The dark and dreary days of winter, may reflect a darkness in your own spirit. If that is the case, if you are overwhelmed, discouraged, and feeling like your problems or issues are getting the best of you, then I urge you to read God is Able by Priscilla Shirer.

Shirer unpacks, word by word, Ephesians 3:20-21. Like an older, wiser sister, Shirer assures us that whatever has us troubled, no matter how small, God has it covered. As Olivia Pope says, "It is handled."

In fact, it is more than handled. God promises He can do exceeding abundantly beyond all that we ask or think.

Once more, we have the power within us to take away the fear, anxiety, self-doubt, need to be in control. All we have to do us turn unto Him. Lay it on the cross with the knowledge that He, who made the heavens and the earth and counted every hair upon your head, is there in the little nagging thought bubbles and the large tsunami of worry that washes over you on sleepless nights. He has a plan we cannot see and He wants us to turn unto Him who is able and receive His peace.

When you are in a tough place, it is difficult to discern what God has planned. Why would he let cancer take a young husband and father? Why would he call you to a new career path only for it to be taken away some months later? Why is a question we are good at asking, isn't it? "What if?" is another question that can haunt us if we allow it.

I have had those nights filled with fear, feeling out of control. I have asked those whys and what ifs. Through it all, God was teaching me that there is really little I can control, that I must decrease, the He is Lord, that he has my back and it all works out for good. Looking back I can see a thread that has run through my life drawing me to Him. And I'm learning to lean in to His promises. The more I let go of my need to be in control and lay my worries on the cross, the more peace I find. He's got this. And it will be exceeding abundantly more than I can ask or imagine. How cool is that?

Disclosure of material connection: I received one or more of the products mentioned above for free in the hope that I would give it my fair review. I only recommend products or services I use personally and believe will be good for my readers. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising."

Is It Time to Recast Your Nets?

Have you ever tried to reach a goal and always seem to come up empty? Maybe it was a goal to lose weight and despite following the diet plan to the letter, you just didn't see the scale move. Maybe it was to reach a milestone in your career and you are having trouble getting traction. Or maybe you are unemployed and just can't seem to get interviews scheduled. Maybe, moms, it's the frustrating task of potty training that last child. Whatever it may be, perhaps it's time to recast your nets.

Back in the time of Jesus, two fishermen were equally frustrated. They had fished all day and came up empty handed. Along comes Jesus teaching to crowds of people and seeking a little distance from the crowd. He asks the fisherman to take him out on the water and continues to preach. 

After preaching, he turns to Simon and tells him to give it another try go back out there and recast your nets. Now, Simon and the fishermen were probably like us, tired from the day's work and a little defeated that despite the hard work, they had come up empty handed. Perhaps they even felt like giving up. 

But when the preacher asked, they didn't come up with a lot of excuses. "I'm too tired" or "It's been a long day and I've already cleaned my nets." Naturally, they were skeptical, but something about Jesus gave them enough confidence to go back out to the deep waters and recast their nets. They obeyed and the results were overflowing!

Perhaps Jesus is asking you to go back in the deep waters and try again today. If you are following God's will, you can be assured your efforts are not in vain. Resilience is a common trait of people of faith as we learn to trust God that all things, and all of our efforts in faith, work out for good. So go out there and get back in your boats! Recast your nets and praise God for the catch.

"Now it happened that, when the crowds pressed toward him, so that they might hear the word of God, he was standing beside the lake of Genesaret. And he saw two boats standing beside the lake. But the fishermen had climbed down, and they were washing their nets. And so, climbing into one of the boats, which belonged to Simon, he asked him to draw back a little from the land. And sitting down, he taught the crowds from the boat. Then, when he had ceased speaking, he said to Simon, Lead us into deep water, and release your nets for a catch. And in response, Simon said to him: Teacher, working throughout the night, we caught nothing. But on your word, I will release the net. And when they had done this, they enclosed such a copious multitude of fish that their net was rupturing. And they signaled to their associates, who were in the other boat, so that they would come and help them. And they came and filled both boats, so that they were nearly submerged. But when Simon Peter had seen this, he fell down at the knees of Jesus, saying, Depart from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man." Luke 5:1-8 CPDV See it at YouVersion.com: http://bible.com/42/luk.5.1.cpdv

Super Woman Went Down: Mary, Martha and Super Woman Syndrome

What happened to 31 Days?

Superwoman Went Down

Luke 10:38-4238 As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. 39 She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. 40 But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” 41 “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, 42 but few things are needed—or indeed only one.[a] Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”

Last month I took on a challenge to write a blog post daily for 31 days. Having not set into a regular posting schedule for my blog, I felt this would be a good discipline. Since God has been really working on me lately on balance, priorities, self-worth--(Jennifer, Jennifer - you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one), I chose the theme 31 Days in the Life of a Superwoman Sufferer to help me unpack what the Holy Spirit has been telling me in my heart. I was coming along pretty, smoothly despite a packed October schedule. The practice of writing has helped me process a milestone time in my life. Admittedly, there were nights I was posting with one eye open at 11:55 p.m., but I was writing almost daily and that was good. 

And then I went to Allume, a three day conference for Christian woman bloggers, and I got sucked into a black whole of information overload, fatigue, piles left behind that needed sorted out and urgent calendar events, like Halloween.

I have so much to share about Allume (more about this later). This was my second year attending and it felt like part blogger conference/part blogger retreat. The sessions were meaty and creative and I came way from then longing to find time to just write. The schedule was jam-packed from sun up until way past sundown. I met some amazing women and enjoyed heartfelt conversations and learning from their talents. The keynotes and mealtime gatherings were times of praise, worship and encouragement. Although I enjoyed networking, being inspired and honing my craft, By Sunday, I was ready to head home and be with my family. The month of travel had taken its toll. 

I headed home with every intention of blogging, continuing my 31 Days challenge, setting up a writing space in my home, etc. Then life, "catching up" and an Allume hangover of great fatigue caused me to push down the spring of creativity that was welling up within and move into "get er' done" mode.

After arriving home from Allume, I immediately had to load my oldest up and head to Girl Scouts. In the week ahead we had a chili cook-off at work, the World Series (congratulations Red Sox), the Breeders Cup Classic and the Florida v Georgia game. The RedSox Fan would be heading out on Friday and Saturday for his sports utopia and I taxied the kids to tutoring, a birthday party and a Daisy troop meeting. Our house desperately needed a cleaning after October travel led us to neglect the homestead. And I began a 21 day detox of all sugars, grains, corn, soy, peanuts, eggs and dairy on the day after Halloween (glutton for punishment I know, but it is needed). So, I spent much of last week in a frenzied fog. 

As I was trying to equip the kids for Halloween fun, I was struck with the memory of my mom sewing costumes until the wee hours of the morning for me and my brothers. I was Strawberry Shortcake, Ronald McDonald, a panda bear and more. Many handmade by mom. We had so much fun dressing up. With my birthday a week prior, October was always a festive month.

I honestly have no idea how she did it! Well, no time for sewing for me. My oldest wanted to be Katness from Hunger Games so we scoured the GoodWill for green cargo pants and black boots the night before Halloween. Amazingly, my parents had a bow and arrow (not sure why, my dad was never a hunter). My sweet five year old changed her mind several times from fairy princess to Batman to a witch (thankfully we already had these costumes) and my youngest was an army man (GI Joe) for part of the day and a RedSox player for the rest. We got it all together just minutes before we headed out for Trick or Treating. 

So as I began this week, with a round trip road trip to Charlotte, my mind and body were screaming for rest and quiet and order. I'm still climbing out from fatigue, brain fog, detox, piles of emails and work projects and school fundraisers and activities for the kids. I'm figuring out how to balance it all and am three feet under water looking to when I will be able to tread water at the surface. Despite a full, blessed life, I come to the end of my own strength. Do I buck up and press through as Martha did? (as I typically do) or do I listen to the spirit within that calls me to become a Mary and rest in His presence?

That is in essence what it means to suffer from Superwomen syndrome. The misguided thinking that we can do it all, we can push through, we can do it on our own strength. We forget that the most important place to be is at the feet of Jesus. We cannot harvest a memorable life without Him.

So, I meditate on the following verse which reminds me, and admonishes me, to rest and become quiet to find the strength to move forward and salvation from the heavy yoke:

In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it.  (Isaiah 30:15).